The Story That Makes No Sense
by KiyonoMiona
Summary: Multi-fandom fic. Avengers, A-Team, Primeval, Doctor Who, Sliders, Tremors, and more to come. THIS STORY MAKES NO SENSE YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED! MixmasterRevolution story.


**HALLO! Citty was bored yesterday so we stared a TOTALLY RANDOM FIC of many different fandoms! YaY°**

**WARNING: THIS WILL CONFUSE YOU :I**

**DISCLAIMER: WE DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE FANDOMS IN THIS STORY OR THEIR CHARACTERS.**

* * *

_**The More the Merrier**_

"Larry! Come help me with this transmitter would you?" Tyler called.

Larry was over quickly. "Sure thing, Bro. What'cha need?"

"Hand me that screwdriver."

The sci-fi fan handed him the tool. "So, you got any tours today, Tyler?"

"If I did do you really think I'd be sittin' up here on this mountain fixing this stupid machine?" Tyler ground out as he fumbled with the stubborn screw.

"I wasn't sure," Larry shrugged, "'Cause Burt's got a survival school class. It was a party of three, but there's still three guys hanging around the store."

"What do they look like?"

"Um, there's a big guy with blonde hair," Larry said, trying to remember, "A guy with a goatee- he looks familiar, I think I've actually seen him on TV. And a guy with glasses," he shrugged.

"Oh, I love a guy with classes."

"He said glasses, not classes you moron. Now shut up before they realize we're here."

"Oh my gosh, you two bloody suck at this whole silent thing don't you?"

Tyler shared a confused look with Larry. "Who's there?"

"Uh...no one!"

Larry looked around. "What are people doing hiding out here?" he asked, baffled.

"It was a bit of an accident really," one of the male voices called. "My ship-"

"Car!"

"-car got rather messed up with...stuff. And we ended up here by mistake. We just weren't sure whether or not you were friendly."

"Are you?" the other male asked.

"Depends on who you are," Tyler replied, peering at the rock the voices seemed to be coming from. "You have any affiliation with the government or mob?"

"Uh...no, don't think so."

"Then probably. Who are you?"

The three stepped out from behind their hiding place. Two men wearing long travelling cloaks and a dark woman. The man with darker hair grinned at the two residents and held out his hand.

"Captain Jack, nice to-"

"Stop it."

"What, he asked!"

Larry grinned. "I'm Larry and this is Tyler," he introduced excitedly.

"Nice to meet you Larry and Tyler," the other man smiled. "I'm the Doctor."

"And I'm Martha," the woman added.

"And I'm Jack," Jack said again with a wink at Larry who just stared back at him blankly.

"Yes I think we covered that, thank you." The Doctor stepped past them to inspect the transmitter. "What's this for?"

"Uh-picking up radio signals," Tyler replied. "From...things."

"Ah."

Larry shrugged. "It's something Burt set up," he explained, "He never really told us what it does."

"Right, sorry to bother you, but, do you have any food?" Martha asked. "I am _starving_."

Almost immediately the Doctor bounced up from his inspection with an excited glint in his eyes. "Oo, cheeseburgers!"

* * *

Larry was the first to enter the store. The three men he had seen before he had left were still there. The first one he saw was the goateed man, looking disappointedly at a can of bear.

The slightly disheveled-looking man holding glasses frowned at him slightly. "Tony, just because you can afford thousand-dollar bottles of vodka doesn't mean you have to look at that like it's poison," he said from where he sat at the counter.

Jodi came out from the back of the store, looking slightly surprised to see Tyler and Larry. "What are you guys doing back already, I thought you said you'd be gone most the day?"

"Sidetracked," Tyler replied, jerking his head towards the hitch-hikers. "And the Elvis one wants cheeseburgers."

"Sure thing," Jodi said calmly, giving Larry a small welcoming kiss on her way past. Martha rolled her eyes at the sudden downcast look on Jack's face.

Larry jumped slightly at a small startled cry, which surprisingly came from the rather large an muscular blonde guy at the back of the store. He had an A.B. lighter in his hand with a little flame coming out of the end.

He dropped it and it went out. "The tiny plastic creature caught on fire," he said sheepishly at the strange looks.

Tony rolled his eyes. "Never seen a lighter before, Goldilocks?" All he got in response was a deep grumble from the man.

Tyler shook his head and turned to Jodi. "I'm headin' back out to help Burt with the hedgehogs. See ya later."

Jack jumped to his feet and hurried after the tour guide, ignoring the Doctors' yell of annoyed protest. Tyler raised an eyebrow at him as he climbed into the passenger seat of the jeep. "What do you think you're doing?"

"Coming with you. Is that a crime?" Jack asked innocently.

"Maybe. Get out."

"Why?"

"Because you're not coming with me, now get out," Tyler said exasperated.

Jack pouted. "I'll just follow you if I do, at least this way you can keep an eye on me."

Tyler glared at him for a moment longer but finally decided he wasn't in the mood to but heads with the man and gave in. "Why do you want to come so bad anyway?" he asked as he started the vehicle.

"Just because."

* * *

Burt paced slowly back and forth, on edge. The stronger guy with light brown hair was okay; except for the fact that you could tell he was very military. The red-haired woman was honestly a bit nerve-wracking, having barely spoken a word to the survivalist the entire time. But who really bothered him was the one who constantly corrected him, proved him wrong, and insisted on using a bow and arrow.

This was the strangest class he had ever had. It was almost a relief to see Tyler's tour jeep pulling up, giving him an excuse to ignore the odd group. Tyler walked over, casting a partially curious but unsurprised eye at his class. Another man in a long coat followed him, giving Burt a genuine grin.

"Who are you?" Burt asked the unfamiliar man suspiciously. He ground his teeth as he heard an arrow snap into a piece of wood and catch on fire behind him. How many times would he have to say they needed to start the fire _by_ _hand_?

"Captain Jack," the man replied cheerfully.

"He and two others showed up on the mountain when I was fixing the transmitter," Tyler told him. "He insisted on coming with me for some reason."

"People showing up out of nowhere," came the arrow-guy's voice from behind them. "That always ends well."

Burt rolled his eyes under his sunglasses. "Is there an emergency? You need me back in town?" he asked, maybe a bit to hopefully.

Tyler shook his head. "No, just thought you might like some company." He took in the annoyed aura coming off the survivalist in waves. "Or help."

"Good," Burt breathed through gritted teeth, "Because these people are driving me crazy."

"I heard that," the woman said non-chalantly.

Burt rubbed the bridge of his nose and shook his head.

Tyler chuckled. "What do you want me to do?"

"Get the guy with the arrows off my back," he said, motioning to the man.

"'The guy with the arrows' has a name," he countered. "It's Barton."

"You shoot with a bow? Cool," Tyler looked at them closer. "What's with all the different gizmos?"

Barton adjusted the strap around his shoulder. "Some of them are grappling hooks, some of them catch on fire or explode, that kind of thing," the man explained.

* * *

MEANWHILE, NEAR ROSALITA'S...

Out of nowhere, a strange blue-ish vortex appeared. Wind blew strongly from it, and suddenly a young woman shot out of it. Then a young man. He was followed by a portly older man who landed unceremoniously on his back. He barely had the chance to roll out of the way of a middle-aged black man.

Rosalita stood at her kitchen window; hands paused in the middle of cleaning a plate, and stared at the sudden appearance of the blue light and strange people. She'd known the valley could be strange but this? What the heck was going on now?

The four people helped each other up, looking around at their surroundings. The dark man let out a happy yell. "Way to go, Q-ball! Almost thought we weren't gunna make it outta that one!" he grinned, patting the young man on the back.

The young woman took off a light jacket, looking at the older man. "Looks like we wound up in another dessert, huh, Professor?" she asked.

The large man nodded. "Let's just hope any of its possible inhabitants are more hospitable than the last world, Miss Welles."

"Excuse me!" Rosalita stepped out onto her porch and regarded the group with annoyance. "What do you think you're doing popping up on my ranch out of nowhere?"

The gazes of the people turned to the young man, who bit his lip trying to think of some sort of explanation. "Okay, I guess I'll just go with the truth. So, we're travelers from a parallel universe," he said with a sort of goofy smile. "I'm Quinn, and this is Wade Welles, Professor Arturo, and Rembrandt Brown," he introduced them.

The professor smiled politely. "Sorry to... trespass on your land miss, but would you mind tellin' us where we are?" he asked in a British accent.

Rosalita just stared at them for a moment. "Perfection Valley, Nevada," she replied finally. "And it's Rosalita, not miss."

Of course," Arturo nodded.

"Is there a nearby town or somewhere we can get to?" the dark man, Rembrandt, asked. "We haven't eaten in about two days," he laughed.

Rosalita opened her mouth to respond but was interrupted by the loud ding of her oven inside, signaling that the enchiladas were done. She sighed. Might as well. "No need, I just made some enchiladas. Come on."

* * *

"NO!" Danny screamed his anguish for the world to hear, kicking dirt at the place the anomaly had been, where it _should_ be. All that trouble he went through to stop Helen from destroying the human race and he now he was stuck here, in God knows what era, at the start of the human race.

He collapsed on the ground and stared at the surrounding rock desolately, the exhaustion from the past day catching up with him. He didn't try to fight it, too tired to put up much of an effort anyway. Slowly the world faded away as the blissful dark of unconsciousness took him and his last thought was how glad he was that there weren't any Predators around.

It was dark when he finally woke up. Soft murmuring noises surrounded him and after a few moments he realized that his ancestors had joined him. One of the children was sitting at his head, grooming his hair as he slept. He looked up at the brown hair covering its body and the soft brown eyes staring back at him from the chimp-like face. It moved away as he sat up. A male came over to him, offering a small bent piece of bark filled with water. Danny took and drank it gratefully.

"Thank you," he murmured even though he knew it wouldn't understand.

He stood up and stretched; feeling much more refreshed though not really much better. He was still lost both miles and years from home. He sighed. "Ok Danny, let's think positive here. At least you're not stuck back in the Cretaceous Period, like-" ..._'Like Connor and Abby.'_

He wondered if Abby had managed to get Connor to safety before the baby raptors had woken up. Or maybe they had managed to escape through another anomaly. Danny would give anything to see that glittery, white and yellow light shining like- like that!

Danny ran forward quickly, ignoring the confused protests of the ancient humans. It couldn't be, it couldn't. It was! He nearly cried with joy as he stopped in front of the shimmering vortex. "Thank God."

With a single glance back at the future of the human race he raced through and found himself standing on the edge of a large, desert valley. With familiar trees, shrubs, air. And best of all. A town.

* * *

In the store, the man with the glasses stared in shock out the window at the back of the store; a recent renovation due to a creature attack. Tony waved a hand in front of his face.

"Yo, Earth to Banner. You're not gunna Hulk-out on us, are you?" the dark haired man asked.

Banner pointed out the window. "Am I the only one who saw that?"

"Saw what?" Jodi asked worriedly, following his gaze and hoping he hadn't seen a new mixmaster creature running by. One, it wouldn't be good if that secret got out and two, she really wasn't in the mood to deal with one at the moment.

"Like, a portal, thing," Banner said, sharing a knowing look with Tony and the blonde man. The three simultaneously started towards the door in an almost panicked demeanor, getting outside as quick as possible and racing around to the back of the store.

Larry gave Jodi a confused look. "A portal?"

She just shrugged and hurried after them. "Where was it?"

Banner pointed to where a man was coming down the hill. The ginger-haired man grinned at them in pure relief as he ran towards them. He was covered in dust and dirt and small cuts but seemed otherwise unharmed.

The blonde man, Larry remembered being called Thor, leaned over towards him. "Do you know that man?" he asked. Larry shook his head.

Jodi moved forward to greet him. "Are you okay?"

The man grinned. "Couldn't be better. Well, could be, but much better than I thought I was. Name's Danny, Danny Quinn."

"Jodi. And this is my husband, Larry."

Larry shook the man's hand. "Welcome to Perfection," he smiled. "We're usually not this crowded."

"Oh trust me, I'm used to far more people," Danny replied with another smile. "By the way, uh, where exactly is this town located?"

"Nevada," Larry replied. "Uh, how did you get here?"

"Nevada? As in the United States?"

Jodi nodded, just noticing his British accent that sounded like he was from London.

"Well, that's good. And as for how I got here, well, you wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"We'll believe you!" Tony said overly-happily from behind them.

Danny raised an eyebrow at him. "Either way it's classified. Sorry."

"Classified?" Jodi asked suspiciously. "Are you with the government?"

"Uh...no, not technically but yes. It's just...classified. But for good reason and nothing that will concern you."

"Figures," Banner mumbled, going back towards the store. Then, barely audible, "So am I." He was followed by Thor, but Tony stuck around outside.

"OMCHEESE TONY STOP STANDIN' AROUND AN PLANT THE BLUEBERRY PEANUTS ALREADY!" a young woman of about 18 yelled from the top of the store. "I told you last night, remember? We gotta be ready for the wobbles!"

Tony pointed up towards the roof without looking. "I do not know that person," he said matter-of-factly.

A shorter, dark-haired girl appeared next to the shouting blonde. She led her away. "Come on, Vlad, it's not our time yet."

"What?!" Vlad looked at the watch on her wrist. "Aw man, don't tell me this stupid thing sent me to the wrong time. That's the _last_ time I steal from Jack."

"Ok then...Now that that's over, who's hungry?" Jodi asked. "The burgers should be nearly done by now."

"I'm in," Tony said casually.

* * *

For once, at a time that had nothing to do with deadly creatures or government agents, Tyler couldn't blame Burt for his paranoia. These three, who had introduced themselves as Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanoff, and Clint Barton, were really strange. Not that strange was strange, Reed knew that most outsiders thought the Perfectionites to be strange; but the fact that it was someone other than them was a little odd.

Barton had finally let him take a few tries at shooting the arrows (mostly because he was able to laugh at Tyler's feeble attempts) but now they were all sitting around a fire, handmade this time, and just kind of staring at each other while they waited for Burt to do..._something_.

"If you are to find yourself displaced in an unfamiliar environment," Burt started, "The first thing you must do is establish a sense of direction."

"Presumably without a compass," Steve responded.

Burt nodded. "Well done, Rogers. Yes, if you do not have a compass on you, you must use the position of the sun to guide you."

"And how exactly do we do that Mr. Teacher?" Tyler asked after a few moments of more awkward silence.

Burt sent him a glare and Clint chuckled. Great, he had just added to the problem. "We use a stick as a sundial."

"Oh I love sundials," Jack spoke up with a distant smile on his face. "I had my first kiss on a sundial. Ah, ancient Rome. Best place on earth if you ask me."

Tyler frowned. "How the heck could you have been to ancient Rome?"

Jack's smile faded slightly and he glanced sideways at the others. "...school trip."

Burt frowned out of frustration and confusion. "Yes, well..." he mumbled, beginning to bury a stick halfway in the ground.

"HELP! MUDSUCKER ATTACK, MUDSUCKER ATTACK!"

The whole group jumped to their feet in surprise just as yet another man came bursting through the trees, screaming bloody murder. He practically clobbered Burt, hiding behind his back and holding onto his shirt as if his life depended on it. And by the look on his face it probably did.

Burt pulled away from the man, baffled. Barton had instinctively spun around; his bow drawn in the direction the stranger had come in.

The sounds of a large something could be heard rushing towards them, shortly followed by muffled shouts of "I'ma kill you, fool!" and "B.A., come on, it was an accident, let it go!"

Moments later a large, dark, and muscled man with a mohawk shot into the clearing, closely followed by another smaller, leaner man with light brown hair and a smooth face. He was obviously trying to keep the angry bulk from the first stranger, who was still hiding behind the survivalist, but wasn't succeeding very well.

Burt impatiently held the first stranger at arm's length.

Steve stepped forward, setting his jaw. "May I ask what's going on, gentlemen?" he asked formally with a hint of sarcasm at the end.

"He's tryin' to kill me!"

"You crashed your stupid helicopter into my van, fool!"

"Oh for the love of Pete, would you stop!"

All three scared, angry, and tired voices rang out nearly at once. Tyler stepped forward quickly to help subdue the large man. It took several minutes but he finally calmed down enough to where he wasn't trying to strangle anyone.

"Ok," Tyler took a deep breath. "Now that everyone's calmed down, would you please explain what happened?"

"He destroyed my van," B.A. muttered again.

"It was an accident," the light-brown said. "We had some trouble with the engine at the last moment and Murdock was lucky to land without killing us all."

"Who are you?" Burt asked tensely.

"Face. The big guy here is B.A. and the terrified one is Murdock. Sorry to have interrupted your...whatever."

"Your name is Face?" Jack asked.

"It's a nickname," Murdock put in helpfully.

Burt raised an eyebrow. "Why are you in Perfection? And all the way out here?"

"Like I said, our helicopter broke down," Face repeated. "We realized there was something wrong and tried to land but the engines gave out completely and we ended up falling instead."

"I hate flyin'," B.A. grumbled.

"Well, welcome to Perfection," Burt mumbled. "The more the merrier," he added, voice laced with sarcasm.

* * *

Faaaaaaaaaaaar away in a universe completely different from anything one could imagine, an old thin man stood on the single small balcony near the ceiling of the large round room. The floor consisted of a single large mirror, of sorts, that reflected the image of whatever the man wanted. At this particular instance, it was showing the sudden appearances of humans, aliens, and lab experiments in the valley. There were few more yet to come but he knew they would arrive shortly.

He smiled, his blue and silver teeth glinting in the images light, "Time to begin."

* * *

**ödfjgjflkdjflkdsjfoingljfkjd lidjfkdjgoidfdsjfkjdbfo dhfjsdjoids kfldsfdsoifhkfjdskfbsdkjfh dsljfhdskh uihf ui hf Review :D**


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